GUEST POST: WRITING MEANINGFUL PERSONAL ESSAYS

Guest Post by Sara Hodon

Sara Hodon’s work has appeared in History, Harrisburg Magazine, Young Money, and WritersWeekly.com. She is also a weekly columnist for Online Dating Magazine. Visit her blog at http://adventuresinthewritinglife.blogspot.com.

All writers infuse their work with a little of their own personality and voice, no matter the genre. But few genres allow a writer more freedom to express themselves and connect with readers than the personal essay.

A well-crafted essay about an experience from your life can strike a chord with readers, whether it’s a humorous or sad incident. We all have those memories of disastrous family vacations, awkward high school experiences, or people who have made a lasting impact on our lives.

Journals can be a helpful tool to write a meaningful essay. I know that when I go back and read my old journals, I’m almost instantly sent back in time to a particular event or period of my life. Even if the words on the page don’t tell the whole story, I can remember what was going through my mind at the time that I wrote them. That helps me to fill in the details or portray a certain tone for the essay.

Even though the goal for most writers is to get our work published so we can share it with our readers, it’s not easy to put ourselves out there and divulge so much personal information. Let’s be honest—writers have fragile egos, no matter how thick a skin we develop after endless rejections from editors or publishers. We accept rejection as part of the process, but that doesn’t mean it gets easier to swallow! Besides just putting ourselves on the page, writing essays often means writing about those closest to us—family, current or estranged friends, and current or former loves—and hoping our words don’t cause hard feelings.

One of the most important things to remember about writing personal essays is that you’re telling the story as you remember it. You may be writing about your family’s fiasco of a family vacation to the Grand Canyon when you were 10, and no doubt every member of your family will remember that vacation differently. So be it—the essay is your memory. If so many things on that vacation went wrong, it could be perfect material for a humorous piece that would make even your well-meaning but hapless dad chuckle. Just like most writing, it’s all in your approach.

A personal essay is an important way to develop your own voice and confidence as a writer. Not sure how to get started? Go back and read those old diaries and journals and see if anything triggers a strong memory. Then, get writing. You may not become the next David Sedaris or Sloane Crosley, but you just may be able to craft a piece that makes your readers shake their heads or chuckle in knowing sympathy. Their dad was well-meaning but hapless, too.

Three Methods To Fix Reader Fatigue on Web Pages

by Sean D’Souza

Have you ever struggled to read the text on a web page? You're keen
to read the material, but not sure why you're struggling. And it's
not because the language is difficult. And it's not because the
topic is unknown. Yet there's something that's driving you batty.

It's something on the page itself, but you can't put your finger on
it. And it's causing a bit of a Reader Fatigue.

===============================================
So what is Reader Fatigue?
===============================================

Reader Fatigue is a scenario where something on the page is causing
a bit of grief to the reader. They desperately want to read what
you're saying but a bit of tiredness creeps in and then they give
up. And off they bouncity-bounce to the next web page--the web page
that isn't so tiring.

And what's interesting is that you can quickly remove this factor
of Reader Fatigue by considering three core issues.

===============================================
But before we get started on removing Reader Fatigue...
===============================================

...Let's get one thing straight. What I'm about to tell you may sound
like a grammar lesson. Well, it is a grammar lesson in a way, but
not quite. It's more of a conversion lesson.

If your customer gets tired reading your articles, or your sales
page, they just leave. And if they leave--heck I don't have to tell
you what happens--you've lost a customer. And you've lost a customer
over a simple matter. A matter that can easily be fixed.

===============================================
So let's examine three issues that you can fix right away:
===============================================

Issue 1: Constraining the thought to one idea.
Issue 2: Width of the line.
Issue 3: Avoiding chunky paragraphs.

===============================================
Issue 1: Constraining the thought to one idea.
===============================================

The rule is simple. Keep your sentences down to 15-25 words at
best. This is because a sentence with fewer than 25 words usually
contains one thought. And when there's just one thought in the
sentence, the reader can quickly grasp the thought and move on to
the next sentence. And the next. And the next.

Long sentences tend to be long because the writer is unable to
restrain their thoughts, and they just plough on relentlessly, not
knowing where to stop, till finally they stagger to a halt, and you
get a sentence like this one: where the reader has forgotten what
you were saying in the first place.

Now of course you don't write sentences that are sixty words long,
but it's easy to slip into sentences that are 35-40 words. After
all 35-40 words are just two lines on your word processing program.

So the easy way to restrain your thoughts is to focus on your word
processing program when typing. If your sentence is streaming
across the width of the page, then you've probably written about 15
words. If your sentence is going to 25 words, that's about a line
and a half on the word processor. It's now time to put a full
stop. And start a new sentence.

By putting full stops in your sentence it's easy to take a
lonnnnnnnnnng sentence and restrain the thought.

E.g.
Long sentences tend to be long because the writer is unable to
restrain their thoughts. They just plough on relentlessly. And
never seem to know when to stop. Then finally they stagger to a
halt. And you get a sentence like this one: where the reader has
forgotten what you were saying in the first place.

So yeah. Keep sentences short.

===============================================
This takes us to the second factor of Reader Fatigue: The width of
the line.
===============================================

If you look at your newspaper, you'll notice something quickly. The
newspaper is divided into columns. And the width of the line
doesn't go past eight or nine words across. This width restraint is
put in for a reason. It allows your eye to read, get some breathing
space and then go to the next line.

The width of your web page text needn't be as constrained, but not
much wider than 15 words wide. An average web page can easily
accommodate about 30 words of text on one line. And putting 30
words of text in one line is a big mistake. And it's a mistake
because the text becomes tiring. It's hard to read.

The way around this problem is to make sure you split your web page
into two or three columns (Ask your web designer if you don't know
how to do this 'split'). The column you most want to focus on is
the text column. How many words do you have in your main text
column? If it's 15 words or thereabouts, then you're ok. If not,
you need to fix it right away.

===============================================
And once you're done fixing those two issues, let's examine the
third issue: chunky paragraphs.
===============================================

Magazines and newspapers work with restricted space, so they often
have chunky paragraphs. But web pages don't have restriction issue.
And it's in your best interest to take advantage of this
unrestricted space by breaking up your paragraphs.


And here's the reason...

When the reader looks at your page, all they see is a waterfall of
text. If you have long, dense paragraphs, the material on the page
looks intimidating. An intimidating page is more likely to drive a
customer away. What's sad is that this problem can easily be fixed
by making your paragraphs less dense.

And the way to make it less dense is to restrict your paragraphs to
about 4-6 sentences in all. Once you've put in about six sentences,
just put in a break and create a new paragraph. This break gives
the reader some breathing space and visually it's far less
intimidating.

===============================================
Ok, time for a summary:
===============================================

1) Constrain the thought to one idea: keep sentences down to 25
words at best.
2) Check the width of the line on the web page. About 15 words.
That's it.
3) 4-6 lines in a paragraph is enough. Move to the next paragraph
and create breathing space.

Some of these changes are easy to make going forward, and some of
them may need some going back to edit your existing web content.
It's well worth the trouble to make the time to implement these
changes.

Because as I said: This ain't about grammar. It's about conversion.
If you drive a customer batty with your web pages, you only have
yourself to blame.

=======================================
Product Offers: Links you should visit
========================================
"I first bought the Brain Audit in 2002. It was 32 pages long.
And I thought it was the best damn book on copywriting I had read!
It laid down the entire sequence of elements that any successful
salesletter or presentation needs to cover to make the prospect say
"yes!"

I really thought that Brain Audit could not be improved upon.

But year after year, Sean has been proving me wrong. He has
improved upon it. And improved upon it. And improved upon it.

Sean's added more details to the Brain Audit. More stories and
analogies. Better graphics (and fun cartoons!). He has used every
teaching trick possible to make sure that you not only understand
the sequence of elements needed to make people buy from... but the
sequence soaks into your thinking pattern.

Today, Brain Audit 3.2 is 157 pages long! And its the best* book
on persuasion you will ever read!

* Until Sean comes out with version 4.0 a year or 2 down the line.
But you really can't afford to wait a year or 2 to take advantage
of the Brain Audit, can you?"

Ankesh Kothari, Adventures of a serial entrepreneur, India
Judge for yourself http://www.psychotactics.com/brainaudit


2) "One reason I didn't sign up for 5000bc until now is because I
expected a huge price tag."

"The quality of information is so high and the hype so low, I just
assumed it would be another high-ticket purchase that I couldn't
really afford.

It wasn't until I spoke with Perry at The System that I found out
how affordable it is. Just listening to ONE audio on pricing--that
was worth my yearly fee right there!"

Julie Anne Eason,USA
Judge for yourself http://www.psychotactics.com/5000bc

Have you used any of these methods to fix reader fatigue on your web pages? What other methods have you tried?

Give Yourself Permission

Written Works Collection: Poetry

Give Yourself Permission To:

Laugh out loud
Enjoy the crowd
Do a little dance
Give life a chance
Sleep in late
Vegetate
Fall in love
Not work so hard
Love yourself
Not hurt so much
Live carefree
Be who you are
Reach for the stars

In your writing life, what do you have to give yourself permission to do?

The Quotable Writer

"Writing is essentially a lonely occupation. A writer is blessed who has people who support and encourage along the way." --Mary Higgins Clark

"Words are the open book to your soul." --Ana V. Rios

"Words are the pen of the heart but music is the pen of the soul." --Shenur Zalman

"My heart is stirred by a noble theme as I recite my verses for the King; my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer." --Psalm 45:1

"The big advangtage of a book is it's very easy to rewind. Close it and you're right back at the beginning." --Jerry Seinfeld

"If you can't think up a new idea, try finding a way to make better use of an old idea." --Ralph Waldo Emerson

"A good beginning makes a good ending." --English Proverb

"A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it." --Mark Twain

"...Words are a form of action, capable of influencing change. Their articulation represents a complete, lived experience." --Ingrid Bengis

What quote has inspired you today?

Follow Up and Writing Prompt

Pay It Forward Recipient
Congratulations to Daveda, from Grace Talk With Daveda, for making a comment on my "Pay It Forward" post and joining in this fun exchange. I will be sending her a free gift with "goodies", which I know she will enjoy. Please visit her blog for some very spiritual and inspirational posts.

Writing Prompt
I was listening to an audio CD from Simon T. Bailey about "releasing your brilliance". He talks about courage, facing your fears, valuing your partner, living your life and investing in yourself. According to Simon, we are all "brilliant carats" that need to be shaped and polished. He says you should be not only an aspirin but also a vitamin.

As a writer and in your every day life, how are you like an aspirin, a vitamin or both?

Pay It Forward

Alisia Leavitt in her own words “is a twenty-something aspiring fiction author.” Her blog, Alisia Leavitt, “features writing advice, guest posts, latest news, interviews with writers, and commentary on all things literary.”

Back in July Alisia wrote about a “Pay It Forward” gesture she received from Angie Michaelis (Angie’s Write). She got a special free gift and all she had to do in return was to “Pay It Forward” herself to two to three other readers. I was one of those lucky readers. I got my gift in the mail this week. I was very excited to get it. Alisia sent the gifts in a bubble mailer with colorful flowers on it. The contents were: a beautiful book mark called a “book thong”, a small spiral bound notebook with hexagons on it, a miniature, pink, gel pen, that actually has pink ink and a heartfelt, hand written note card from Alisia. All the gifts had some pink in them, which is my favorite color and all are essential tools for any writer. Thank you, Alisia, very much for these thoughtful and handy gifts.

Now, it is my turn to pay this act of kindness forward to three other readers. Here is how it works:

1. The first three readers who agree to “pay it forward” and sign up in the comments will receive a gift from me.

2. If you are one of the three selected, all I ask is that you link back to me and blog about it.

3. The gifts you pass on to other readers can be anything you like and do not have to cost much. They can be handmade and should be fun, inspiring or uplifting.

4. I will announce the three recipients of my “pay it forward” in my next post. I will need to get postal addresses sent to my email at: thewritertoday@aol.com.

I decided to join in on this because I thought it would be fun and nice to receive, as well as give, gifts to fellow writers. It is also a great way to spread encouragement and support.

Who will be the next “Pay It Forward” recipients?

Nine Life Lessons

“Our prayer becomes part of God’s divine work of reaching and saving the lost. And we learn to find our happiness in losing ourselves in the salvation of those around us” – Andrew Murray

In a previous post I wrote about the Second Annual Life Lesson Essay Contest, sponsored by Real Simple magazine. It made me think about the life lessons I had learned in the past year. I had been unemployed, until recently, and in this "time off" I had the chance to really think about my life and life in general. Not all is lost when faced with an adverse situation (not working and concerned about meeting financial obligations). These are the life lessons I want to share:

1. Value the job you have – I valued my job more when I did not have a job. I used to stress and feel overwhelmed sometimes at all the things I had to do at work. But, I liked what I did and when I was not working, I missed it and wished I had it back. I thank God that I am finally working again, and any job now is a “piece of cake”, no matter how big or small.

2. Take stock of your life – Are you where you want to be or doing what you want? I started my two writing blogs while I was home. I had not dedicated the time to writing because I used to put it in the back burner. I took advantage of the time off and focused my energy on learning about the writing craft through books, blogs and websites. It has been well worth it. I can finally say I am a writer now and I am on my way to making my dream of being a published author a reality.

3. Connect or reconnect with your child(ren) – In the busyness of everyday life I found that I was not dedicating the time I needed to my daughter. I was not really talking to her, aside from the “how was your day at school”? question. In this past year, we have grown closer together and I have gotten to know her as a person much better. I can actually have a conversation with her and get more than yes or no answers. I take the time to just sit and chat about what is on her mind, concerns, etc. Now, I do not even have to ask her about her day, she tells me all on her own. I do my best to keep an open mind, especially when she talks about boys.

4. Treasure your family and friends – I found that I was not doing a very good job about keeping in touch with my family and friends. I was either too busy or too tired. I was not into any social media, (Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn) like I am now. I think this is a great way to keep in touch and just say “Hi, I am thinking about you”. Friends and family is all I got and I have learned to really nurture these relationships.

5. Build and develop a relationship with God – I know everyone has their own beliefs, but I committed myself to reading the bible and learning from it. I pray every day, not just when I am faced with challenges, and I say “thanks” for everything I have. I am not a religious fanatic, but I have peace within myself through prayer and reading God’s word.

6. Explore new things – I took classes on being a substitute teacher, a notary public and effective interviewing in the time I was unemployed. I also volunteered at my church. I love to learn new things and help in worthwhile causes. I am thinking that if I did not have to work or when I retire, I would like to take classes on things that interest me (photography, piano, flower arrangement, wedding planning) as well as do volunteer work. Doing these things, to me, opens up your horizons and leads to possibilities you did not know exist.

7. Always have HOPE – No matter how grim and desperate the situation. Have faith in God (or whatever entity you worship). Love yourself and be thankful every day for every breath. It is so true that when one door closes, another one opens and in the most unexpected way.

8. Stay faithful to who you are – Do not lose your identity because of circumstances or mold yourself to be someone you are not because someone wants you to. Do not feel less of a person or allow anyone to put you down.

9. Look beyond the surface of any situation – The grass is not always greener on the other side. Before making any major moves that will affect yourself and your family, look at all the angles. I feel that when I have been too close to something I have not been objective enough and my judgment has been clouded. I have learned to take a step back and really think things through before I act on something. By the same token, I trust my instincts more too.

What life lessons have you learned?

MONDAY MUSING: Why Writers Should Consider ePublishing

Why Writers Should Consider ePublishing

Posted using ShareThis


What are your thoughts about ePublishing?

GUEST POST: TREASURE IN YOUR MARRIAGE

Guest Post by Warren Baldwin

Warren and his wife Cheryl live in West Kansas. They have a grown son and daughter and another daughter still at home. Warren and Cheryl have ministered with churches in Florida, Wyoming and Kansas. They have been married for 27 years. Please visit his blog Family Fountain .





Jesus said, "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also" (Luke
12:34). Jesus applies this principle of treasure to spiritual things: if our
hearts are devoted to God and Christ, we can give up our earthly possessions
for the good of others and the glory of the kingdom. In giving our hearts to
heaven we place our treasure there: our time, energy and money. Everything
we are and everything we have is devoted to the pursuit of heaven.

Dr. Debbie Cherry, a marriage counselor, applies this principle of
"treasuring" very creatively to marriage. An experience common to all
married couples is the waning of the warm glow of the wedding, honey moon,
and first months in the new relationship. Anticipation, excitement and
ecstacy give way to schedules, work and stress.

Quickly on the heals of stress come irritants to the relationship:
irritability and criticism. Before we couldn't see any faults in our
beloved; that may be all we see now. The treasure of marriage is diminishing
and we become leery of investing more emotional energy into a relationship
that is causing pain. Irritants may soon become major emotional injuries
that drive people to a divorce or a marriage counselor.

Dr. Cherry says that many couples find marital therapy a very negative
experience. In fact, therapy can make troubled marriages worse. Why? It too
often focuses on problems, hurts and other negatives. In her book,
Discovering the Treasure of Marriage Dr. Cherry writes, "Unless I first help
them (the troubled husband and wife) learn how to like each other again,
they will not feel connected enough to each other and the marriage to work
on the negative aspects" If a couple can find what they cherished in their
partner and genuinely like each other again, then they can reconnect and
"being to look at, resolve, and forgive past hurts"(p.16).

Dr. Cherry teaches spouses to like each other again by teaching them to
treasure their husband or wife. Each letter in the word T-R-E-A-S-U-R-E
stands for positive thought or action we can take toward our spouse to give
them our heart and value them in our own.

T = Think Positively about your husband or wife. Intentionally overlook irritating behaviors in him or her and focus attention on what is good.

R = Respect your spouse. To respect means to hold in high regard and treat with consideration and care.

E = Enjoy the company of your partner. "Rejoice in the wife (or husband) of your youth" (Prov. 5:18). Remember when pleasure and laughter was natural to the relationship? It can be again.

A = Attend to the needs of your spouse, serving them and offering genuine praise.

S = Shield your husband or wife from hurtful words and behaviors (maybe even from you). "Love always protects" (1 Cor. 13:7).

U = Understand your spouse's needs. Give the attention it takes to learn what those needs are. The golden rule for marriage is: "Do unto others as
they need you to do."

R = Romance your mate. Think about your spouse when you are apart and show love when you are together. When is the last date you had together?

E = Edify your partner. "Encourage one another and build each other up ..." (1 Thess. 5:11) ought to apply as much to marriage as any other
relationship! One way to edify is to show appreciation. (Pp.66-76)

"Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also" means we have
control over where we place our affection. We have the power to decide to
give our husband or wife our positive energy. We can treasure them and our
hearts will follow. The joy and pleasure that characterized the early days
of our marriage can thrive today when we honor our spouse as treasure from
Heaven.


What do you do to treasure your marriage?